This quote by Lisa Jo Baker is something that so many moms I know feel on a daily basis. This world we live in is full of constant pressures, stresses and mompetition (competition among moms). We all have in common the desire to be the best mom possible and not miss out on a single event or milestone for our children, but yet we sometimes tear each other down trying to prove we are better and most times it is completely unintentional.
Why is it that we think we are screwing it all up? Honestly, I truly believe it comes from comparison and as they say, “comparison is the thief of all joy.” Today’s world is filled with social media every direction we look and moms are constantly comparing themselves to other moms instead of just focusing on their own strengths. We compare the highlight reels of our “friends” on Facebook and Instagram with our own reality that oftentimes may not be nearly as exciting or glamourous. How do we overcome this? How do we not get caught up in the mom who makes exotic dinners with every color of the rainbow represented on the plate after she returned from a day of educational field trips around Dallas with her perfectly-coordinated children who are still unwrinkled and unstained from a day of play? Oh how I wish there was a simple answer or a secret recipe for this because if we’re being honest, we are all comparing ourselves to other moms based on what we see on social media.
After many coffees with moms and hearing their complaints and comments about the stress of summer coming, I decided to try something new this year in the hopes of putting the focus on MY family and doing what they want to do and not what others think we should do to have a great summer. Summer of 2017 is all about living like a kid! I sat down with my daughter (who is 8 and going into the 3rd grade next year) and asked her what her ideal summer looks like and we made a list. Here is what she wants to do this summer:
*Go to the beach
*Learn more about sea life
*Read all the summer reading books for school
*Learn to sew
*Swim in the pool when it’s dark
*Makes S’mores in the backyard and sleep in a tent
*Fish in the lake behind the house
*Go on a boat ride on Lake Ray Hubbard
*Learn to take pictures
*Start a business to raise money to join the FFA (Future Farmers of America)
*Bake with mommy
So she wants to spend a lot of quality time with the family and learn over the summer. We will most likely be able to do all 12 of these things on her list to give her the best summer ever. My list would have been completely different for her if it was left to me to plan it all. My list would’ve involved more travel and bigger experiences instead of more time at home reading, crafting, baking and just being together. I love to travel and see and do new things, but she likes things more low key and structured so this is what we will do this summer.
While I know this article can’t change how we feel as moms and the “mompetition” will always be there, I’m hoping that maybe this summer we let ourselves be okay with doing what our kids want to do (within reason of course!), we cut ourselves some slack as moms and we rid the guilt and know that we are doing the best we can every day to be amazing moms to our children. Wishing you all a summer full of memories whether they be made out of the country exploring or in your own backyard exploring…as long as you’re together it WILL be the best summer ever!
By Stacy Lynn Massar, Rockwall mom and Realtor with JP & Associates Realtors. Read her “Not So Southern Stacy” guest column at BlueRibbonNews.com.