Fate, TX (October 28, 2024) – It was a quiet pleasure to wake up to a foggy morning here. The slow start appreciated, as I was up during the night having one of those sleepless times. Not wanting to sit and look at my iPad, I went to the guest room to putter a little on an ongoing closet project. Digging through a plastic bin of old cards, letters and newspaper articles; and rehoming into more manageable boxes was interesting. I glanced at but did not read them all. I will enjoy that meandering later, sometime in the long winter months. I am glad I kept those memories. There is space on the closet shelf for the condensed boxes of remembrances. I stumbled back to bed in the very wee hours. Bob Kilgore began his wakeup quest by walking atop my head sometime after seven a.m. and was not willing to offer me mercy today. Rotten, beloved kitty. Still feeling his birthday oats apparently, he turned fourteen yesterday. Currently he is curled in the front window, catching up on his snoozing.
I’ve been to Helping Hands three times in the last few weeks. First drop off found the back of Ammi filled with items cleared out as I began a closet project. Pillows, clothing, beach towels, shoes, bedding. Once I’ve finally bundled it all out to the car, and the plunder resides there for a week or two until I remember to stop at the donation center; it never fails that a few more items come up to donate. And so, I made a second trip with a couple more bags. Following the ever so invigorating and inspiring task of switching out summer clothing with winter in the master closet this past week, I returned to drop off an additional three bags of clothing, accessories, costume jewelry items.
I am always mindful of the lesson learned during our move. Purge and purge frequently. We’d put our home on the market in September several years ago, it sold immediately, and I found myself in October and early November plowing through twenty-four years’ worth of clothes, décor, books (books are hard to purge, choices must be made) furniture, craft items, dishes, kitchen items, and a garage full of stuff. Kitchen gadgets that were found to be superfluous went to the donation center. Craft items that were used at one time, but not used up, can be put to good use by someone else. We are office supply hoarders. I don’t think any home of two has ever held so many empty hanging file folders. I’ve come to realize there is only so much we must keep on hand. If the cupboards and closets are full, we have what we need.
Accomplishing what is popularly called downsizing is no easy feat. It is more appropriate to say perfecting our size. Thinking of the approaching senior years, I wanted a dwelling more manageable and sized for two. I was determined to let loose of closets crammed full of goods and release a huge burden. That mission was accomplished and is ongoing. The release and lightness are considerable. After moving into our newly built home, I continued the call to arms; purging even as the movers were moving furniture in, we pulled items out and the movers were all too happy to take them home. Too many televisions were whittled to a single tv. One television is enough for the two of us.
My enduring daughter in law still receives texts and photos from me “want this?” Sometimes she does, other times, she is wise and replies “no thank you!” Although she recently accepted re-assignment of a sweet rug from our home that will work nicely behind her sofa, and I am so glad. It’s a good rug and perfect for a young family with a big ol’ dog. I continue to purge, give, donate and provide room for the items I need and want now, letting go of the things that have become expendable for my existence. Make no mistake, if you’ve seen my home, you know I am not a minimalist. I’ve learned the benefit of parting with the superfluous and passing it on.
Photo by Sally Kilgore
It is fall, and I’m seeing dazzlingly hued photos shot in the past week in Michigan’s U.P. and other regions. I long for the fall temps and resulting colors of other parts of the country. I’ve looked back at past photos of an October trip to the Pacific Northwest and another in the U.P., both are my ideal of heaven. I drank in the beauty on those trips and took a thousand photos. The B.O.B., my devoted driver, patiently stopped the car many times. I remember a few ravishing Texas autumns with brilliant and rich colors in the trees, piles of bright leaves on our lawn.
I am reminded, as we move closer to November, how the trees and the garden let go in the autumn, release and relax, taking rest for the winter. Reenergized, they return with vigor next spring. Even as I work in the garden on mild mornings, I can feel my energies turning in, slowing, preparing for the evenings that darken earlier, ready to feel cozier. I am not regretting seeing the turning of some plants this year, letting me know they are ready to clip back or pull out. I’ll leave some perennials standing, to dry through the winter for the birds. I know the garden will not be as lovely through the winter as in the other three seasons. We all need the downtime, an interlude, the quietude of wintertide.
Reminded of the joy of spring with all things new, I also hold deep appreciation for the time of releasing, of drawing my spirit in, settling, putting away the tools of the seasons of growth and allowing my body and mind to rest. Just as there is no productive rationale in keeping items that are no longer of use to me; I must consciously dwell on releasing troubling thoughts and unburdening myself of the things over which I have no control. This yearned for release I work for continually.
As I endeavor to move forward through these seasons of life, I strive to release my mind, let things go with the winds of autumn, allow them scatter with the leaves, give my spirit time of regeneration and rest.
I hope you have opportunity to let go and sit in an autumn breeze. Maybe with a martini!
Sally A. Kilgore, lives creatively and writes in Fate. Yes, It’s Fate. She is married to her long-time flame, Judge Chris Kilgore, and their Tuxedo cat, Bob Kilgore. Sally’s work has been published in The Dallas Morning News, The Orchards Poetry Journal, Blue Ribbon News, and Persimmon Tree. You can enjoy her blog on her website and contact her via SallyAKilgore.com.
Kukka by Sally Kilgore: Relinquish added by Melanie M on
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