October 17, 2012 – We all need to feel like we belong. And the most important place we need to feel like we belong is in our families. It is from our family relationships that we build relationships within our schools, our churches, our neighborhoods and our communities…and beyond. According to Rudolph Dreikurs and Alfred […]
At a neighborhood coffee, Cheryl announced that she had stopped eating sugar. Several women gasped at the thought. “But that’s so limiting,” said one. Cheryl smiled and said, “Actually I find the limitation is quite freeing. I don’t worry any more whether I should eat something or not. Drawing the line at no sugar has […]
“Good judgment comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgment,” read the sign in the gift shop. The sign reminded me of what I’ve learned about errors: since mistakes are at the forefront of learning, it is best if we can be friendly with error and welcome mistakes for the learning opportunities that they […]
Summer nights right before the news there was a public service announcement: It’s 10 o’clock, do you know where your children are? What I’d like to hear today is this: Do you know who your children are? When parents or grandparents contact me asking for advice about how to handle a child who is being […]
August 14, 2012 – Establishing routines with our children is an effective and powerful way to set boundaries. Setting limits helps our children feel safe, and allows them the freedom to focus on skill building and learning. Our routines, though, may have unintended consequences. If we spend the morning reminding, organizing and coercing our children […]
Our children are inundated with demands from the adults in their lives. At times all those words may sound like a never-ending torrent. I’m reminded of a YouTube video that made the rounds a couple years ago of The Mom Song, three minutes of commands sung to the William Tell Overture. What an exhausting way […]
“You throw that ball and you’re grounded for a month.” “You talk back one more time and I’ll give your bicycle away.” “You don’t eat your peas, you won’t be able to have dessert.” The traps we can fall into as we work with children. In our efforts to have our children change their behavior, […]
Oh, what challenges we have as parents trying to find the right fit for our parenting style. If we come down too strong on an issue, we think perhaps our need for control is bubbling over. If we ignore a problem or allow bad behavior to get its way, maybe we’ve given our power away. […]
Final installment in a 10-part series on Parents as leaders. As parents we lead and manage our children. If we lead without adequate management skills, logistical problems arise. If we manage without providing clear leadership, we may travel a long road to nowhere. Leadership focuses on developing people, empowerment, doing the right things, direction and […]
Part 9 of Maren Schmidt’s 10 part series on Parents as Leaders Effective leaders empower the whole person to do the whole job of self-leadership and management. Epictetus said it well over two thousand years ago, “No man is free who is not master of himself.” In order to help others help themselves, we have […]